Carla woke up with a problem. For the last two days, the young woman had been experiencing an enormous amount of stress, from fighting with her uncle to interdimensional travel to watching a man bleed to death in front of her. Besides all of that, everything that Carla had eaten in that time had been prepackaged and canned food- mostly beans and corn. On top of this, she’d spent a lot of the time dehydrated and moving around a lot more than most days. Of course, any dramatic change in stress, diet or level of exercise can lead to problems with one’s digestive system. And so it came to be that Carla had not used the bathroom since coming to the Lost Dimension.
“Uncle Mel, what’s wrong?” Carla poked her uncle in the chest. The hamburger hat on her head mirrored her movements, nearly poking Mel in the eye with its meaty little fingers. Shock can be paralyzing, but a good way to get over it is to have a hamburger hat puppet thing poke at you. That hat had never been Mel’s favorite when Carla was a kid, but it was worse now, drawing way too much attention to his niece now that she was a young woman. It was also sort of unnerving, between the cartoonish eyes and the fact that it often mirrored its wearer’s movements. Thus Mel shook himself out of his daze and forced himself to answer.
So I wake up one day and I’m pissing the bed and honestly it’s freaking me out because, you know, I’m a grown man. I have control of these things. I dart off to the bathroom and after I’m over the toilet and all I’m fine, you know?
But I’m not because it doesn’t stop. I’m just standing there, peeing. I try to stop the flow, you know, hold it in, pinch it off, and I can last maybe half a second before boom here it goes again. So I switch to sitting down and by now I know something must be wrong because I’ve been peeing for at least five minutes here and I’m not feeling any sort of relief.